Friday, October 15, 2010
Horsing Around Friday Funny
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This week we are having a funny look at horses. Inspired by the famous Spring Racing Carnival here in Passy World's hometown of Melbourne. There might be some interesting hats around at the races, but will there be any as good as this little number?
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Horse Jokes - Part 1
Here are some classic Horsey Jokes from the Internet
A horse walks up to the bar and orders a drink from the bartender. The bartender sets the drink in front of him and tells the horse, "Hey buddy, Why the long face?"
An out-of-towner accidentally drove his car into a deep ditch on a country road. Luckily, a farmer happened by with his big old horse named Betsy. The man asked for help. The farmer said that Betsy could pull his car out, so he backed Betsy up and hitched Betsy to the man's car bumper. Then he yelled, "Pull, Nellie, pull." Betsy didn't move. Then he yelled, "Come on, pull Ranger." Still, Betsy didn't move. Then he yelled really load, "Now pull, Fred, pull hard." Betsy just stood. Then the farmer nonchalantly said, "Okay, Betsy, pull." Betsy pulled the car out of the ditch. The man was very appreciative but curious. He asked the farmer why he called his horse by the wrong name three times. The farmer said, "Oh, Betsy is blind, and if she thought she was the only one pulling, she wouldn't even try."
Of course Horses are not into water sports. They are not nearly smart enough to go swimming:
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But they are pretty good at driving boats around and making an ass of themselves:
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But seriously, horses are made for horse riding, and the bigger the better:
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But sadly not everybody can ride a real horse, and some have to live in the world of make believe.
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Movies for Horse Lovers
The Bridle of Frankenstein
Gentlemen Prefer Palominos
Prances with Hooves
For Whom the Belgian Toils
Lawrence the Arabian
The Man with the Gelding Farm
The Day the Girth Stood Still
The Fall of the Horse of the Usher
Horse Blanket Bingo
Saturday Night Feeder
Gone with the Whinny
Cool Hoof Luke
Bonnie and Clydesdale
Here is a great compilation of funny horse pictures from YouTube.
Let's hope the Melbourne racing carnival doesn't see any horses going off crowd surfing.
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Horse Jokes - Part 2
Two stupid men bought a bunch of horses at an auction, paying one hundred dollars apiece for them. Then they drove to another auction, and sold all their horses for the same price they'd paid for them. After counting their money at the end of the day, they realized that they'd ended up with no more money than they'd started with. "See!" said one. "I told you we shoulda bought more horses!"
There was a preacher who was trying to sell his horse. A man stopped by to see how the horse rode. The preacher told the man that instead of saying "walk" say "praise the Lord" and instead of saying "whoa" say "amen." So the man got on the horse and said, "Praise the Lord," and the horse started to walk. The man then said, "Praise the Lord," again and the horse started to trot. He said it a few more times, then the horse started galloping. Suddenly a cliff appeared. The man yelled "Whoa!" but the horse wouldn't stop. He tried yelling all sorts of things, and he tried to pull the horse up, but the horse wouldn't stop. Then suddenly he remembered what to say. The man said, "Amen." The horse stopped right before they fell off. The man was so relieved that he put his hand on his forehead and said, "Praise the Lord."
One famous funny horse from the good old days of black and white TV is Mr Ed. Here he is making his Baseball debut.
You Know You are Into Equestrian when.........
- You frequently have to explain things to your non-horsey friends;
"No, a pony is NOT a baby horse"; "A farrier has nothing to do with
faries"; "When I said I was training a stud, I meant a horse, stupid!"
- You are one of the few people who can talk about whips, spurs, and
leather and not think anything kinky.
- You've embarassed yourself by mentioning spurs, crops, leather, stud services, etc. in public without realizing how it sounded.
- Your arms and face are tanned, but your legs aren't.
- Your idea of a perfect boyfriend/girlfriend , besides being sweet, smart, and
caring, and all that -- is one who can fix stalls, muck barns, and
enjoys riding on the beach.
- You haven't been on a date in a long time and you think you'll
probably end up marrying a farrier or a vet (since they are the people
you see most often).
- If you have Facebook, it includes more photos of horses than of you.
- You accept Facebook friends instantly if they have a picture of a horse in their profile.
Horsepower in engines is something most of us are familiar with, but it makes no sense to a horse:
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Here is a long and kind of stupid Horse Versus Gorilla video, have a look and see what you think.
So that's the short and tall of it for this Friday Funny.
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On your horse, and giddy up!
Big Passy Wasabi