Friday, January 7, 2011

Parental Friday Funny

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This Friday Funny goes out to all the parents who are spending quality time with their kids over the Christmas holidays.

The title of this first video says it all.

Here is another video along the same lines. But really can you blame the parents for just wanting to play with their kids?

Being a dad has certainly changed over the years, and here's proof of that.

Fathers Then & Now

Fathers of 1900 didn't have it nearly as good as fathers of today; but they did have a few advantages:

In 1900, fathers prayed their children would learn English.
- Today, fathers pray their children will speak English.

In 1900, a father's horsepower meant his horses.
- Today, it's the size of his minivan.

In 1900, if a father put a roof over his family's head, he was a success.
- Today, it takes a roof, deck, pool, and 4-car garage. And that's just the vacation home.

In 1900, a father waited for the doctor to tell him when the baby arrived.
- Today, a father must wear a smock, know how to breathe, and make sure film is in the video camera.

In 1900, fathers passed on clothing to their sons.
- Today, kids wouldn't touch Dad's clothes if they were sliding naked down an icicle.

In 1900, fathers could count on children to join the family business.
- Today, fathers pray their kids will soon come home from college long enough to teach them how to work the computer and set the VCR.

In 1900, fathers pined for old country Romania, Italy, or Russia.
- Today, fathers pine for old country Hank Williams.

In 1900, a father smoked a pipe.
- If he tries that today, he gets sent outside after a lecture on lip cancer.

In 1900, fathers shook their children gently and whispered, "Wake up, it's time for school."
- Today, kids shake their fathers violently at 4 a.m., shouting: "Wake up, it's time for basketball practice."

In 1900, a father came home from work to find his wife and children at the supper table.
- Today, a father comes home to a note: "Jimmy's at baseball, Cindy's at gymnastics, I'm at adult-Ed, Pizza in fridge."

In 1900, fathers and sons would have heart-to-heart conversations while fishing in a stream.
- Today, fathers pluck the headphones off their sons' ears and shout, "WHEN YOU HAVE A MINUTE.."

In 1900, a father gave a pencil box for Christmas, and the kid was all smiles.
- Today, a father spends $800 at Toys 'R' Us, and the kid screams: "I wanted X-Box 360!"

In 1900, if a father had breakfast in bed, it was eggs and bacon and ham and potatoes.
- Today, it's Special K, soy milk, dry toast and a lecture on cholesterol.

In 1900, a Father's Day gift would be a hand tool.
- Today, he'll get a new iphone app.

In 1900, a happy meal was when Father shared funny stories around the table.
- Today, a happy meal is what Dad buys at McDonald's.

In 1900, a father was involved if he spanked the kid now and then.
- Today, a father's involved only if he coaches Little League and organizes Boy Scouts and car pools.

In 1900, when fathers entered the room, children often rose to attention.
- Today, kids glance up and grunt, "Dad, get out of the way of the television."

In 1900, fathers threatened their daughters suiters with shotguns if the girl came home late.
- Today, fathers break the ice by saying, " long have you had those face piercings and full body tattoos?"

In 1900, fathers were never truly appreciated.
- In 2011, fathers are never truly appreciated.

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Today we may have all the mod cons, but there is still a lot of Bad Parenting going on out there.

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Here are a couple of wonderful crusaders of all things good, showing us exactly how we can help re-educate all of those bad parents.

But when all else fails putting up with the kids on holidays; desperate times call for desperate measures.

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We need to trust our evolutionary instincts, and remember it's all about the whole family thing.

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In this difficult day and age, it's up to the parents to take control and teach their kids all the right things.

Things My Mother Taught Me
  • My Mother taught me LOGIC..."If you fall off that swing and break your neck, you can't go to the store with me."
  • My Mother taught me MEDICINE..."If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they're going to freeze that way."

  • My Mother taught me TO THINK AHEAD..."If you don't pass your spelling test, you'll never get a good job!"

  • My Mother taught me ESP..."Put your sweater on; don't you think that I know when you're cold?"

  • My Mother taught me TO MEET A CHALLENGE..."What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you...Don't talk back to me!"

  • My Mother taught me HUMOR..."When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

  • My Mother taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT..."If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up.

  • My mother taught me about GENETICS..."You are just like your father!"

  • My mother taught me about my ROOTS..."Do you think you were born in a barn?"

  • My mother taught me about the WISDOM of AGE..."When you get to be my age, you will understand."

  • My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION..."Just wait until your father gets home."

  • My mother taught me about RECEIVING...You are going to get it when we get home.

  • and my all time favorite thing - JUSTICE..."One day you will have kids, and I hope they turn out just like YOU..then you'll see what it's like."
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Here is an excellent summary diagram of how this whole passing on of all things valuable occurs within the modern close-knit family unit.

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But it's not all nasty unhapiness, and there are still plenty of fun times to be had for the modern family.

For example, parents just love to dance and so do their kids.
Because Dancing is fun... right?

Let's hope you all get to enjoy some quality family time this weekend.

Big Passy Wasabi

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